{"id":67,"date":"2012-12-12T08:43:37","date_gmt":"2012-12-12T08:43:37","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/e-straus.net\/?p=67"},"modified":"2013-10-24T20:57:53","modified_gmt":"2013-10-24T20:57:53","slug":"tell-tale-signs-you-might-be-slovenian-part-i","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/e-straus.net\/?p=67","title":{"rendered":"Tell-tale signs you might be Slovenian, Part I"},"content":{"rendered":"

You might be Slovenian if:<\/em><\/p>\n

– You own a car, a house and some land and you’re always complaining <\/strong>about being underprivileged.<\/p>\n

– Whenever somebody visits you apologise profusely <\/strong>for your house being such a mess despites the fact the whole place is next to sterile with no clutter in sight.<\/p>\n

– No matter how broke you claim to be you seem to have little problem finding money for high-end sports equipment<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

– You claim to have no money while going out for drinks every night and taking seaside vacations and ski trips <\/strong>several times a year.<\/p>\n

– You believe a deep tan <\/strong>is a sign of health and athleticism and feel obligated to drop hints to this effect around fair-skinned individuals.<\/p>\n

– You believe your politicians must be some sort of an experiment gone wrong<\/strong> and are under no circumstances to be considered a reflection of your national character.<\/p>\n

– You will vote for anyone who promises to raise the taxes <\/strong>for somebody other than you.<\/p>\n

– You are a staunch believer in a non-violent society and your ideal solution for achieving it would be to hunt down and execute all crooks and thugs <\/strong>except the ones you voted for in the last elections.<\/p>\n

– You believe the best way of preventing public officials from stealing <\/strong>is to beat them to it by paying as little tax as possible and then sucking it all back through benefits and allowances.<\/p>\n

– You’re raising your kid together with your partner while collecting your single parent benefits and complaining about those benefit scroungers<\/strong> at the same time.<\/p>\n

– You believe a stay in a labour camp <\/strong>could fix most character flaws in any politician and you think that it wouldn’t be such a bad idea to put the Goli otok<\/em> facilities back into operation.<\/p>\n

– You didn’t need to google Goli otok<\/em>.<\/p>\n

– You believe Comrade Tito <\/strong>or Maria Theresa<\/strong> could put your country in order if they came back, and you’re secretly hoping they will.<\/p>\n

– You’re tempted to google Maria Theresa<\/em> to make sure she is who you think she is.<\/p>\n

– You’re always watching out for what other Slavic nations are doing<\/strong> and you dread the day one of them officially achieves a better standard of living than yours.<\/p>\n

– You point out how other nations are much smarter<\/strong> with their politics and economy<\/strong> but god help the naive soul who makes the mistake of agreeing with what you just said.<\/p>\n

– You will claim Americans are dumb for not knowing where (or what) your country is while you can’t even name half of the USA states<\/strong>, let alone point to them on a map.<\/p>\n

– You never consider that singing Bandiera Rossa and The Internationale in a public gathering in front of foreign TV crews might hold a potential for spooking your fellow EU citizens<\/strong> or making you seem backward.<\/p>\n

– You have no problem reconciling the idea of individualism with communism<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

– You’re a fountain of knowledge when it comes to stereotypes about every other nation and ethnicity<\/strong> under the sun yet whenever you meet a foreigner you will buy them drinks and treat them like your best friend.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

#Stereotypes about Slovenians, by a Slovenian.<\/em><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

You might be Slovenian if: – You own a car, a house and some land and you’re always complaining about being underprivileged. – Whenever somebody visits you apologise profusely for your house being such a mess despites the fact the whole place is next to sterile with no clutter in sight. – No matter how … Continue reading Tell-tale signs you might be Slovenian, Part I<\/span> →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[8,17,11,12,13,14],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-67","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-english","category-life-in-slovenia","category-satire","category-slovenia","category-stereotypes","category-stereotypes-about-slovenians"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/e-straus.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/67","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/e-straus.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/e-straus.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/e-straus.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/e-straus.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=67"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"https:\/\/e-straus.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/67\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":197,"href":"https:\/\/e-straus.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/67\/revisions\/197"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/e-straus.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=67"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/e-straus.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=67"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/e-straus.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=67"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}